Thins morning, as in 10 minutes, I am going to support a friend do a half marathon! More power to her because i am not sure if I would be able to do it!! Yea Erin!!
Also there is a possibility that I might be able to go to a Ludacris concert on the 18th. i am super pumped. i am just not sure if my parole officer will let me go, but i am going to sure try!! that would be GREAT!! all i am going to be listening to until then is LUDACRIS! positive thoughts around that situation.
Saturday, November 6, 2010
Friday, November 5, 2010
Need to get better at this...
So, I am REALLY going to try hard to journal. I know i say that EVERYTIME but all i need is a little disaplyn and i know that i can do it! Also i ALWAYS feel so much better after a good journal session. I know it is healthy!
So in exactly one week i have invited some friends that i have made over. I am nervous because it isnt just a "normal" hang-out time. i invited 6 people over to tell them my story and where i have come from. So i am kinda excited because these are people that Jenny trusts and i trust Jenny. and with these girls that i have invited over i have gained a frindship with EACH of them. I feel like this whole thing could be good becuase it could be healing for me. So i need to write a note sheet to look at when i am talking to my friends. Because sometimes when i talk i get nervous and forget what i am wanting to say.
The other this that has been on my mind is apartments. By January i am going to be needing an apartment and or a roommate. that scares me. because right now i dont pay rent. so finding an affordable place by then is for sure nerve racking. but i know EVERYTHING is falling into place EXACTLY as it should! So i am trying not to worry too much!
So in exactly one week i have invited some friends that i have made over. I am nervous because it isnt just a "normal" hang-out time. i invited 6 people over to tell them my story and where i have come from. So i am kinda excited because these are people that Jenny trusts and i trust Jenny. and with these girls that i have invited over i have gained a frindship with EACH of them. I feel like this whole thing could be good becuase it could be healing for me. So i need to write a note sheet to look at when i am talking to my friends. Because sometimes when i talk i get nervous and forget what i am wanting to say.
The other this that has been on my mind is apartments. By January i am going to be needing an apartment and or a roommate. that scares me. because right now i dont pay rent. so finding an affordable place by then is for sure nerve racking. but i know EVERYTHING is falling into place EXACTLY as it should! So i am trying not to worry too much!
Sunday, September 12, 2010
Faith...
Hmmm....that is an interesting subject to me. i cant say that i believe in anything. i can say that i believe in myself. this morning i was invited to a friends house and it was a blast there were like 30 people in and out for pancake breakfast. it was fun i got to meet a ton of legit fun people. after wards everyone was kinda going their separate directions mainly to church. i went with jenny, Jessie and Lauren. you know, what could it hurt, i had nothing else to do anyway. so i went. and really it made not believe in this "so called GOD" more. funny huh? but this is how i am feeling. the pastor was talking about, everything you do and everything that happens to you is in GODS pan for you. hmm...okay, look a rape victim in the eye and tell them "God planned that you are going to get raped and get pregnant, oh and go to prison" that is the problem that i have with this God. I'm not trying to complain that going through what i went though has made me the person that i am today, just saying it is a little strange. Sorry GOD...I believe in MYSELF!! In the end that is all i have...ME!
Monday, September 6, 2010
Beauitiful DAY....
The sun is shining, the wind is blowing, life is good! today, i am going to hang out with my favorite Aunt Kim! i am super stoked!!! tomorrow is my grandmas birthday and i wish i could spend it with her but things arent going to work out that way!...bummer...i just have a nice birthday present for her...my graduation pictures!! here they are infact
Sunday, September 5, 2010
Good Morning...
Everyday is a good morning...remember that! there is so much to be thankful for and i cant express that enough. i am at starbucks, checking my email, and appling at a few places. wish me luck that i get a job!
Saturday, September 4, 2010
day with bri
September 3, 2010
So today was simply, AMAZING!! Brianne came to visit me today; we had a blast just enjoying each others company. It was great to see each other and not worry about a time schedule or anything crazy like that. I love the relationship that I have with both Bri and Regan. The things that I can talk to Bri about is amazing, really it is. Some subjects that I would never EVER, bring up with my mom is so easy to talk to Bri and Regan about. This is how a mother daughter relationship should be. That is why I am so thankful for Bri and Regan. I do have someone to talk to about ANYTHING and I feel so comfortable doing so. So if either of you are reading this…THANK YOU!!! It means so much that words can’t express.
It really is amazing to me how, ungrateful “America” has become. I say it as “America” because there are people that go through struggles that realize what life is really about. And by struggles, I’m not talking not having a job, but in my opinion, it is REAL crazy shit. Me, for example, I was in prison. I missed a lot in the 20 months that I was locked up. I missed Christmas, birthday parties, and even sitting at a park watching kids play, dogs barking. A lot of the little things that no one even realizes until it is gone. I talk to a few friends, some older than I, and I realize how much more wisdom I have. MORAL: BE THANKFUL FOR EVERYTHING!
So today was simply, AMAZING!! Brianne came to visit me today; we had a blast just enjoying each others company. It was great to see each other and not worry about a time schedule or anything crazy like that. I love the relationship that I have with both Bri and Regan. The things that I can talk to Bri about is amazing, really it is. Some subjects that I would never EVER, bring up with my mom is so easy to talk to Bri and Regan about. This is how a mother daughter relationship should be. That is why I am so thankful for Bri and Regan. I do have someone to talk to about ANYTHING and I feel so comfortable doing so. So if either of you are reading this…THANK YOU!!! It means so much that words can’t express.
It really is amazing to me how, ungrateful “America” has become. I say it as “America” because there are people that go through struggles that realize what life is really about. And by struggles, I’m not talking not having a job, but in my opinion, it is REAL crazy shit. Me, for example, I was in prison. I missed a lot in the 20 months that I was locked up. I missed Christmas, birthday parties, and even sitting at a park watching kids play, dogs barking. A lot of the little things that no one even realizes until it is gone. I talk to a few friends, some older than I, and I realize how much more wisdom I have. MORAL: BE THANKFUL FOR EVERYTHING!
Friday, September 3, 2010
I am BACK...
September 2, 2010
So today I went and volunteered at a Thrift Store. It wasn’t too bad. I got 5 solid hours of community service. 75 more to go! Alright!!!:) I was supposed to go meet with my counselor but well she kinda blew me off. Hmm…its not the first time that I have been blown off…shows that you cant really depend on anyone. I can only depend on myself and even then I let myself down. Life is weird. There are so many temptations. More than I remember. I have had the urge to get a high feeling. I miss it, it has been over three years and now that I am free it has been so much more tempting. I even thought about having a disgusting cigarette. These are just my thoughts, a way to get things out instead of holding things in. Im really not going to allow myself to do any of these things that would just be suicide.:) Well tomorrow brianne is coming down to chill with me and I am uber excited. Anyway, I should go now, I have a drug test that is calling my name! JOY! J
Affirmations
1. I love myself just the way I am.
2. I am a patient person
3. I am open minded.
Thanks:
1. I am thankful for new opportunities.
2. I am thankful for new friends.I am thankful to be alive.
September 1, 2010
So I haven’t been on in while…but I m back…my life is super crazy right now. Things are slowly calming down. Now recently I have heard that my mom is trying to get in contact with me. So weird because, we do not have a great relationship, and for the past 20 months, we have not been on the best of terms…now that I am out of prison it seems that she is trying really hard to get in contact with me. It is really weird! I don’t understand and it is so confusing to me. She even went as far as contacting my parole officer. And I personally think that is really none of her business to go that far. I almost feel like I am being stalked or something. Why can’t everyone just have a normal life??
Anyway, I am still looking for a job, hopefully one is to come soon!
Affirmations:
1. I am a positive person.
2. I am making the best of my situation.
3. I am a beautiful person.
Thanks:
1. I am thankful to be alive.
2. I am thankful for a new beginning.
3. I am thankful for great friends.
So today I went and volunteered at a Thrift Store. It wasn’t too bad. I got 5 solid hours of community service. 75 more to go! Alright!!!:) I was supposed to go meet with my counselor but well she kinda blew me off. Hmm…its not the first time that I have been blown off…shows that you cant really depend on anyone. I can only depend on myself and even then I let myself down. Life is weird. There are so many temptations. More than I remember. I have had the urge to get a high feeling. I miss it, it has been over three years and now that I am free it has been so much more tempting. I even thought about having a disgusting cigarette. These are just my thoughts, a way to get things out instead of holding things in. Im really not going to allow myself to do any of these things that would just be suicide.:) Well tomorrow brianne is coming down to chill with me and I am uber excited. Anyway, I should go now, I have a drug test that is calling my name! JOY! J
Affirmations
1. I love myself just the way I am.
2. I am a patient person
3. I am open minded.
Thanks:
1. I am thankful for new opportunities.
2. I am thankful for new friends.I am thankful to be alive.
September 1, 2010
So I haven’t been on in while…but I m back…my life is super crazy right now. Things are slowly calming down. Now recently I have heard that my mom is trying to get in contact with me. So weird because, we do not have a great relationship, and for the past 20 months, we have not been on the best of terms…now that I am out of prison it seems that she is trying really hard to get in contact with me. It is really weird! I don’t understand and it is so confusing to me. She even went as far as contacting my parole officer. And I personally think that is really none of her business to go that far. I almost feel like I am being stalked or something. Why can’t everyone just have a normal life??
Anyway, I am still looking for a job, hopefully one is to come soon!
Affirmations:
1. I am a positive person.
2. I am making the best of my situation.
3. I am a beautiful person.
Thanks:
1. I am thankful to be alive.
2. I am thankful for a new beginning.
3. I am thankful for great friends.
Tuesday, December 9, 2008
Guest Post by Brianne
So, yesterday was a terrible day for all of us who love Nikki. She was arrested and is currently being held at Clear Creek County Jail. PLEASE visit her if you have the chance.
DIRECTIONS
The jail is located in Georgetown, Colorado at 405 Argentine Street. Traveling on I-70, you take the 228 exit for Georgetown. If traveling westbound you turn left and if traveling eastbound you turn right. Go to Argentine Street and turn right, stay on Argentine Street till you come to a “T” intersection. Make a left turn on 6th Street and then a right at the first intersection which is the continuation of Argentine Street.
The Sheriff’s Office is the large white building on the corner, which will be on your right. Turn into the first parking lot and walk up the stairs to the double doors. If after hours or on the weekend you will need to use the intercom on the right side of the doors to alert the jail that you are there. Please be patient as it may take several minutes for a deputy to respond to let you in.
VISITATION
Visitation of inmates may be scheduled 6 days a week (Tuesday through Sunday). The hours will be 8:00 a.m. till 11:00 a.m. and 1:00 p.m. till 4:00 p.m. Each visit will only be for 30 minutes.
Each inmate will be allowed two visits per week (Tuesday through Sunday).
The Sheriff Office utilizes video visitation. Visitors will use a video phone in the Sheriff’s Office Lobby and the inmate will use a video phone from the jail. These visits will be recorded and may be monitored during the visit.
Visitors who register with the Sheriff’s Office will be able to set up their appointment time to visit, from any computer with internet access, or by calling the Jail at 303-679-2395. Visitor’s who show up to visit at the Sheriff’s Office and have not set up an appointment time, may have to wait until a time becomes available. Request visitation using this link.
If for some reason visitation has to be cancelled, any visitors who have pre-registered will be notified by phone to the number they supplied that the visit has been cancelled, hopefully saving visitors from driving to the facility.
Two adults will be able to sit comfortably in the visitation booth in the lobby. More than two may visit at once, however please keep in mind that the visit will only be 30 minutes and more than two or three people will severely limit the amount of time that each visitor will have to speak with the inmate.
All adult visitors (over 18 years of age) must have a government issued identification card showing their photograph.
Visitors must be appropriately dressed. Shirts and shoes are required. No form-fitting, suggestive or revealing clothing will be permitted. Persons inappropriately dressed will not be allowed to visit. If an inmate or visitor displays inappropriate behavior, or becomes a threat to the safety of the facility, the visit will be terminated immediately and they may lose their right to future visitation.
PHONE CALLS
Inmates are given one initial phone call that is free. This is to attempt to bond or notify someone that they are in custody. Phone calls after this are either a collect call to the party or on a phone card that the inmate can purchase through the jail. The name of the phone provider is Securis. The billing portion is handled by Correctional Billing Services. Their customer service number is 1-800-844-6591. Their web page is www.CorrectionalBillingServices.com
Phone calls are limited to 15 minutes. You should hear a warning tone 30 seconds before it is terminated. This limit is placed so that all inmates have equal access to use of the phones.
The use of the phones is considered a privilege and can be taken away from the inmates for improper use or other violations within the jail.
Phone numbers can be blocked by the detentions staff. If you are receiving unwanted phone calls please call the jail at 303-679-2395 and ask that your number be blocked.
Monday, December 1, 2008
my game!
I think it's funny when someone I know well emails a questionnaire like this. But I answered most of it anyway and emailed her back. Thought I'd post it here just for fun. Feel free to answer the Q's on your own blog. (Let me know so I can come read!)
1. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE? Yes, Nicolette Sherridan, she was on a soap opra when my mom was pregnate with me!
2. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED? Yesterday, i have been crying a lot!
3. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING? yea...what kind of question is that?
4. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE LUNCH MEAT? Roast Beef
5. DO YOU HAVE KIDS?
6. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU? If I was weirded out by strange, erratic behavior, probably not. If I was really insecure around people who speak their minds, probably not. if i didnt like to laugh...probably not!
7. DO YOU USE SARCASM A LOT? What does "a lot" mean? Every day? Every hour? Everything you say?
8. DO YOU STILL HAVE YOUR TONSILS? yes, and i hope i keep them!
9. WOULD YOU BUNGEE JUMP? Yes!
10. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE CEREAL? captin crunch...except it hurts the roof of my mouth...
11. DO YOU UNTIE YOUR SHOES WHEN YOU TAKE THEM Off? No, what's the point? You untie them, you tie them back up, you untie them, you tie them back up. I can slip on every shoe I own without messing with the laces. And yes, I stomp on the back of my shoes too.
12. DO YOU THINK YOU ARE STRONG? i am strong...maybe not physically...but i have dont a lot that most people might not be able to do on their own.
13. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE ICE CREAM? Ben And Jerries Cherry Garcia
14. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE? Honestly their outfits.
15. RED OR PINK? red
17. WHO DO YOU MISS THE MOST? my sister
18. DO YOU WANT EVERYONE TO SEND THIS BACK TO YOU? No. Because that would take far too long to read.
19. WHAT COLOR PANTS AND SHOES ARE YOU WEARING? Baby blue sweat pants...and socks..
20. WHAT WAS THE LAST THING YOU ATE? Reces pices
21. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW?Atmosphere Happymess
22. IF YOU WHERE A CRAYON, WHAT COLOR WOULD YOU BE? um i would be a changing one..that changes with my emotions that day...today i would be green.its my fav color and im feeling pretty happy
23. FAVORITE SMELLS? freshly cut grass
24. WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE? Kaci Rose!
25. DO YOU LIKE THE PERSON WHO SENT THIS TO YOU? Gosh, I don't know...I'll have to think about that. ;) Of course I like the person who sent this to me! What kind of silly questions IS this?
26. FAVORITE SPORTS TO WATCH? football basketball, snowboarding, snowmobilling, all winter sports!
27. what happened to 27?!?
28. EYE COLOR?Brown
29. Do you wear contacts? no
30. FAVORITE FOOD? mashed potatoes, sushi, pasta, FOOD!
31. SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDINGS? Happy endings but when ever i am with dena we always rent or watch scary movies!
32. LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED? Praticall MAgic
33. WHAT COLOR SHIRT ARE YOU Wearing? Black
34. SUMMER OR WINTER? WINTER!!!!
35. HUGS OR KISSES? yuck. who needs affection? grooooossssss.
36. FAVORITE DESSERT? anything chocolate
37. MOST LIKELY TO RESPOND? don't know, maybe brianne
.38. LEAST LIKELY TO RESPOND? Regan! lol, she probably wouldnt know how to respond!
.39. WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING NOW? None
40. WHAT IS ON YOUR MOUSE PAD? No mouse pad...laptop..
41. WHAT DID YOU WATCH ON T.V. LAST NIGHT? i watched the broncos lose!
42. FAVORITE SOUND? peacefull snow falling
43. ROLLING STONES OR BEATLES?they are not my music generation...but ill sayt the rolling stones cause they have a cool logo!
44. WHAT IS THE FARTHEST YOU HAVE BEEN FROM HOME?Right now...im trying to figure out my home!
45. DO YOU HAVE A SPECIAL TALENT? all my talents are "special". ;)
46. WHERE WERE YOU BORN? California, i didnt chose to be born there!
47. WHOSE ANSWERS ARE YOU LOOKING FORWARD TO GETTING BACK? Briannes.
48. WHAT TIME IS IT NOW? 9:08
1. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE? Yes, Nicolette Sherridan, she was on a soap opra when my mom was pregnate with me!
2. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED? Yesterday, i have been crying a lot!
3. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING? yea...what kind of question is that?
4. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE LUNCH MEAT? Roast Beef
5. DO YOU HAVE KIDS?
6. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU? If I was weirded out by strange, erratic behavior, probably not. If I was really insecure around people who speak their minds, probably not. if i didnt like to laugh...probably not!
7. DO YOU USE SARCASM A LOT? What does "a lot" mean? Every day? Every hour? Everything you say?
8. DO YOU STILL HAVE YOUR TONSILS? yes, and i hope i keep them!
9. WOULD YOU BUNGEE JUMP? Yes!
10. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE CEREAL? captin crunch...except it hurts the roof of my mouth...
11. DO YOU UNTIE YOUR SHOES WHEN YOU TAKE THEM Off? No, what's the point? You untie them, you tie them back up, you untie them, you tie them back up. I can slip on every shoe I own without messing with the laces. And yes, I stomp on the back of my shoes too.
12. DO YOU THINK YOU ARE STRONG? i am strong...maybe not physically...but i have dont a lot that most people might not be able to do on their own.
13. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE ICE CREAM? Ben And Jerries Cherry Garcia
14. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE? Honestly their outfits.
15. RED OR PINK? red
17. WHO DO YOU MISS THE MOST? my sister
18. DO YOU WANT EVERYONE TO SEND THIS BACK TO YOU? No. Because that would take far too long to read.
19. WHAT COLOR PANTS AND SHOES ARE YOU WEARING? Baby blue sweat pants...and socks..
20. WHAT WAS THE LAST THING YOU ATE? Reces pices
21. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW?Atmosphere Happymess
22. IF YOU WHERE A CRAYON, WHAT COLOR WOULD YOU BE? um i would be a changing one..that changes with my emotions that day...today i would be green.its my fav color and im feeling pretty happy
23. FAVORITE SMELLS? freshly cut grass
24. WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE? Kaci Rose!
25. DO YOU LIKE THE PERSON WHO SENT THIS TO YOU? Gosh, I don't know...I'll have to think about that. ;) Of course I like the person who sent this to me! What kind of silly questions IS this?
26. FAVORITE SPORTS TO WATCH? football basketball, snowboarding, snowmobilling, all winter sports!
27. what happened to 27?!?
28. EYE COLOR?Brown
29. Do you wear contacts? no
30. FAVORITE FOOD? mashed potatoes, sushi, pasta, FOOD!
31. SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDINGS? Happy endings but when ever i am with dena we always rent or watch scary movies!
32. LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED? Praticall MAgic
33. WHAT COLOR SHIRT ARE YOU Wearing? Black
34. SUMMER OR WINTER? WINTER!!!!
35. HUGS OR KISSES? yuck. who needs affection? grooooossssss.
36. FAVORITE DESSERT? anything chocolate
37. MOST LIKELY TO RESPOND? don't know, maybe brianne
.38. LEAST LIKELY TO RESPOND? Regan! lol, she probably wouldnt know how to respond!
.39. WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING NOW? None
40. WHAT IS ON YOUR MOUSE PAD? No mouse pad...laptop..
41. WHAT DID YOU WATCH ON T.V. LAST NIGHT? i watched the broncos lose!
42. FAVORITE SOUND? peacefull snow falling
43. ROLLING STONES OR BEATLES?they are not my music generation...but ill sayt the rolling stones cause they have a cool logo!
44. WHAT IS THE FARTHEST YOU HAVE BEEN FROM HOME?Right now...im trying to figure out my home!
45. DO YOU HAVE A SPECIAL TALENT? all my talents are "special". ;)
46. WHERE WERE YOU BORN? California, i didnt chose to be born there!
47. WHOSE ANSWERS ARE YOU LOOKING FORWARD TO GETTING BACK? Briannes.
48. WHAT TIME IS IT NOW? 9:08
Sunday, November 30, 2008
update....
well i am feeling pretty happy! because of all of the snow!!!
right now i am at kims house and it even snowed down here! i am so stoked! i love the snow!
i hate that the days seem to pass by so fast!!
i really dont know what else to say! i have so many mixed emotions! happy all the way to depressed!
right now i am at kims house and it even snowed down here! i am so stoked! i love the snow!
i hate that the days seem to pass by so fast!!
i really dont know what else to say! i have so many mixed emotions! happy all the way to depressed!